This past month we celebrated my 23^rd wedding anniversary. I wanted to share the perfect illustration of our love story, which involves a humble cell phone charger.

Trust me mamas, and keep reading…

We were headed out for a long multi state drive. My hubby had been car shopping for over a year now, and he thought he may have found ‘the one’, (spoiler alert, he didn’t).  Because of the long drive, and thanks to an almost expired hotel credit, we decided to make a weekend of it and create an overnight adventure.

We were an hour into our drive when we saw a police car positioning his vehicle across the highway blocking westbound lanes.  If only I hadn’t asked for that restroom break. This was totally my fault! Now, we were stuck and did not know why. Finally some curious motorists got out to investigate, and shared what was happening with the line of cars.

It is fire season in our corner of the world, and we had several raging all around us. Apparently the fire up ahead had jumped the highway and so it was closed down.  That meant we had to take the only detour available, we had to get off the beaten path and drive further into the remote Indian Reservation.  Hubby knew there was a casino tucked away, a detour to bypass the section of the highway that was now on fire.  So we started driving off on the country roads.

My cell phone coverage switched to satellite as we drove empty roads and counted the looming smoke stacks all around us. It was eerie.  

Miles and miles later, we finally reached a fork in the road.  Left meant back to the main fire highway, right meant a further detour.  The smoke in the air told us ‘left’ was no longer an option. So we went right and instantly added another 30 minutes to our drive. At this point, I was really really regretting that restroom stop!

With navigation going, and thanks to our Indian reservation detour, my cell phone battery was draining. Inside, this was making me more nervous, if that was even possible.

With our last cellphone upgrade a year ago, the charger ends changed too. I have a charging port in my car, and hubby had put a charger cord in there in case of emergencies. I don’t drive very often, so this humble charger doesn’t get much use, if any.  It was for this minimal use reason that I doubted hubby would have remembered to swap out the updated charger cord when we got our new phones.

Nevertheless, my hand reached in the center console and pulled out the charger cord end…

This is what true love looks like…

My hubby did swap out the cord! My cell phone charger worked! Consequently, my catastrophic thinking was quieted for a moment in time, all thanks to my prince charming.

***

Mamas, very early in my marriage, 23 years ago, I read a book that had a profound impact on my life:  The 5 Love Languages. If you haven’t read this book yet, please do! Cracking the love language code is the best thing I did for my marriage. Over the years I have become fluent in my hubby’s love language and now it’s near impossible for me to miss the number of times and ways he says: ‘I love you’.

Our love language differences can also apply to my mamas mourning baby loss. If you are a mama that has lost a baby, you are walking the hardest, saddest road of your life.  And just like our love languages, each mama grieves differently. You may find yourself surrounded by people trying to help, but they just don’t know how.  

Let’s be real mamas, WHAT can anyone say?

You are going to be told a lot of insensitive things by people with good intentions and bad delivery. But here is where the gift of love language translation comes in; Mamas, you can choose to see the good intent behind perceived hurtful words or actions.

The best thing I did in my own grief journey was to assume good intent from my trusted circle of friends.

To my hurting mamas, we have to be willing to receive love and support the way it is shared. If you refuse to learn your loved one’s language you are going to miss out on your ‘cell phone charger true love’ life moments.  

People all around you are screaming, “I love you!” Are you hearing them mamas? Become a love language translator and watch your relationships flourish!

It is never too late to become fluent.